It’s been far too serious around here lately, so it’s time to return to the ever-popular…
Tuesday’s Top 10.
Today we explore the worst inventions of all time (a huge shout-out to Sky Mall for providing me with a centralized location from which to compile this list). I’ve only got seven inventions listed, so I’ll need your help in the comments to finalize the top 10 worst inventions of all time.
1. Nuclear Weapons – We started by throwing stones. Then slingshots arrived. Then spears. Somewhere along the line, it became acceptable to have weapons that not only melt your enemy but destroy the entire earth. This doesn’t make sense to me.
2. End-of-the-World Predictions – Sorry Mr. Camping. Your contribution to this list is irrefutable.
3. CD Storage Towers – What a great invention…for about seven years. Now if you have one, you’re probably using it to hold little trinkets. Mine is in the garage – it’s a spider farm.
4. Animated Sharkbite and Raptor Hoodies – you have to see these to understand how ridiculous they look.
5. Spy Bug Detector – for only $199.95 you can obtain a state-of-the-art spy bug detector. I don’t even know what to say about that.
6. Eye Fatigue Fit-Over Glasses – that’s right, the sunglasses that fit over your eyeglasses. My grandmother had a pair of these that were so large she had to go sideways through doors.
7. Shake Weight – the reasons for this item making the list have been fully explored on Saturday Night Live. The Shake Weight has also been immortalized in this Tripp and Tyler video:
The shake weight makes its appearance in the first 1:30. Hilarious.
Do you own any of these and are brave enough to refute their inclusion? Any suggestions to add to the list?
By the way, if you are a Lost fan, head on over to Popcropolis and check out a guest post I did for them: Lost and the Art of Being Found.
The Speedo.
Unless you are diving into a pool for an activity that may possibly end on a platform with a medal around your neck there is no earthly reason to be out in the visually-enabled public with so little covering your bits.
Spam. both kinds.
Torture devices … otherwise known as women’s high-heeled shoes. Why do women put themselves through that? I think if women want to be taken seriously and be considered equals, they need to start with being comfortable. (how’s that for taking your not-serious Tuesday into a serious direction?)
Have you ever read the story “Silly Asses” by Isaac Asimov? It’s about this powerful extraterrestrial on another planet who is keeping a list of all the sentient life in the universe. The standard for determining this is when a species discovers atomic power. An assistant comes in and tells him Earthlings have made the list. He adds Earth to the list. He asks the assistant where the Earthlings have tested this power and is informed somewhat sheepishly that we used our own planet. Shocked, the being scratches Earth back of the list and mutters, “Silly asses.” Your first entry on the list made me think of that.
I do have a mini spider farm on my desk.
#8) Michael Bay?
This has to make it somewhere on the list:
http://phonefingers.com/index.php/pictures
So much fun here! How have I missed Tyler & Tripp’s YouTube station? There goes hours of productivity in the coming months.
Also, please note that the name Harold Camping can be rearranged to spell GRAPHIC OLD MAN.
The Internet. Biggest time waster of all times.
great list Shawn. well done on the “sideways through doors” bit, well done.
Fun post! The first one is super serious, but in a strange way I’m sort of glad the other things were invented. Just think of all the mileage we’ve gotten out of some of these inventions, in terms of laughs! Where would our senses of humor be without them? What would we joke about on Twitter and our blogs?
That’s a great point, Kristin. Maybe things are only terrible inventions when we limit them to their intended purpose…
Great post!!! How about the ShaveMate Titan 6 razor – with six-blades and a handle that dispenses shaving cream. Do we REALLY need six blades??? The only guy who might benefit from this is Bryan Allain – was he born with stubble???
school
it doesnt teach you anything useful like how to survive in the desert or how to get a job