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Autumn is the best season. I have felt this way my entire life.  Perhaps it’s because I loved the cool weather or always loved going back to school (you know, for the backpacks, the trapper keepers, the #2 pencils . . . dork alert).

In any case, there are only about 5 weeks until autumn, so here are my favorite ten things about “The Beautiful Season”  (or fall, as many of you insist on calling it) in no particular order:

1) The spelling of the word a-u-t-u-m-n. Any word that ends in m-n AND you’re allowed to say without getting a detention must be pretty cool.

2) Cooler weather – while I have noticed that winter is KIND OF losing its appeal with me as I get older and more sensitive to freezing temperatures, the cooler weather of autumn, after the ridonculous heat of summer, is so refreshing.

3) The beautiful fall foliage – yes, I said foliage.   Only people who use the word autumn use the word foliage.  And what could be more beautiful than a host of dead and dying things (leaves) hanging on with their very last strength, only to fall and be consumed with fire.

4) Wood fires

5) Football – from the lights of a Friday night high school game, to sitting inside on a lazy Saturday with a cup of hot chocolate watching Penn State v. Ohio State, to falling asleep after church on a Sunday afternoon while the Steelers clobber their opponent, there is no national past time (sorry baseball lovers) quite as nice as football (yes, I understand that my no-tv rule is in affect until January 1st and may have some impact on this particular activity)

6) Wearing jeans and boots and a heavy sweater, walking through the woods and mending a stone wall (okay, so I’m no Robert Frost, but I still enjoy the aforementioned clothing)

7) The scent of wood fires

8) Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin muffins, pumpkin pie, pumpkins with little, evil faces carved in them, and the delicious pumpkin curry soup my wife makes

9) Thanksgiving, my favorite season of all

10) And this year, for the first time ever, The Fireside Writer’s Conference.  Ha! You thought you were finally getting through one of my posts without hearing about that.

So what’s your favorite thing about autumn? Do you even like autumn? Do you even like the word autumn, or do you find it pretentious?

Today my wife makes her 3rd trip to the DMV in 6 weeks. She has a relatively simple request – magically transferring her Virginia driver’s license to a Pennsylvania one.  Having an in-state driver’s license is a requirement of the state of Pennsylvania.  Apparently living here is in such high demand that they try to make the process as difficult as possible.

During our first trip to the DMV we loaded up our four kids and entered the building with all 17 pieces of information that they require.  We took a number and waited in line.  Then my wife saw the sign:

“No cash, debit or credit cards.  Checks or bank drafts only.”

This is almost as ridiculous as the founder of the Fireside Writer’s Conference (me) expecting everyone to pay with checks. Who even has checks anymore?  And why wouldn’t a government agency accept the VERY CURRENCY THAT THEY ENDORSE FOR ALL OTHER TRANSACTIONS?!?! It’s not like we walked in expecting to pay with rubles.

Well, we didn’t have our checkbook along, so out the door we went, pushing strollers and shouting directions to get our small flock back across the street and loaded up into our minivan.

During trip number two Maile made sure she had the checkbook. She was given a number (something around #218 – they were helping #14 at that point).  Centuries later she made it to the desk.  Victory was just within her grasp.

“Okay,” the woman said, “all I need now is your proof of identity, social security card and proof of residency.”

Perhaps this was where Maile went wrong – she got cocky. She pounded the requisite pieces of paper on to the desk, did her favorite touchdown dance, then spiked her passport on to the floor as if to say, “in your face – you’re silly restrictions and lack of cash acceptance can not stop me from driving legally in PA any longer” (okay, not really, she pretty much just placed all the documents on the counter and held her breath).

“And your second proof of residency?” the woman asked with a diabolical look in her eye.

What?

Yes, hidden 14 levels deep on the PA DMV website, in small print, written in Olde Englysh, is the fact that (2) proofs of residency are required.  You know what else is messed up?  Gun permits count as proof of residency, but bank statements are no good.

It has taken us weeks to gather the courage to try again. Part of me can’t wait to see why Maile won’t get her license today.  But we scoured the website.  Last night we did a mock run, with me as the diabolical behind-the-counter lady.  I couldn’t find a reason not to give her a PA driver’s license.

Say a prayer for us today around 10:30am, if you think about it.

So in case you haven’t noticed, I’ve been on a real Henri Nouwen kick recently.  The guy is, in the words of my British brother-in-law, spot on.  Eat this portion of “Here and Now” for breakfast, lunch and dinner today:

“I am constantly puzzled by my eagerness to get something done, to see someone, to finish some job, while I am fully aware that within a month or even a week I will have completely forgotten what it was that seemed so urgent.  It seems that I share this restlessness with many others…

“Why is it so difficult to be still and quiet and let God speak to me about the meaning of my life? Is it because I don’t trust God? Is it because I don’t know God? Is it because I wonder if God really is there for me? Is it because I am afraid of God? Is it because everything else is more real for me than God? Is it because, deep down, I do not believe that God cares what happens (on my street corner)?

“Still there is a voice – right there, in downtown Toronto.  “Come to me, you who labor and are overburdened, and I will give you rest.  Shouldermy yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. Yes, my yoke is easy and my burden light” (Matthew 11:38 – 30)

“Can I trust that voice and follow it? It is not a very loud voice, and often it is drowned out by the clamor of the inner city. Still, when I listen attentively, I will hear that voice again and again and come to recognize it as the voice speaking to the deepest places of my heart.”

Thanks for the reminder Mr. Nouwen.  What’s that?  I can call you Henri? Well thanks.

So wherever you are right now, reader, take a moment and close your eyes and listen.  What do you hear?  No, not the kids commotion in the back ground…not the fan running or the a/c kicking in…not the dishwasher clicking (I don’t know, ours clicks)…not the music on the radio.  Listen.  Is there something, someone, deeper than any subconscious level you can attain trying to tell you something?

That might sound kind of weird to some of you.  If so, that’s cool – feel free to ridicule me in the comments.

Oh, and if you’re reading this on your cell phone, in your car, you can forgo the whole eyes-closed thing.  Seriously. For the rest of us.

Tuesday’s Top Ten has kind of fallen by the wayside. Not sure why.  Maybe I need some suggestions on some good things to make top 10 lists about.

Anyway, just this Wednesday I’m doing a Wednesday’s Worst: the worst ten things about winning the lottery (I may or may not have stolen this idea from The House Studio).  Here we go (and these have all happened in real life, not just on this blog):

#1 – You could get shot and killed by your sister-in-law while she and her boyfriend are trying to kidnap you and hold you for ransom.

#2 – The photo of you holding that giant check could remind police that someone looking very much like you is wanted for theft and possession of stolen property.  You could then be arrested and incarcerated.

#3 – You could win the lottery twice, lose all the money, and end up living in a trailer (heck, I did this without winning two lotteries – I just became a writer).

#4 – You could string your money together and see how many times it wraps around the world, only to get kidnapped by real live pirates

#5 – You could get sued by your girlfriend for a share of the winnings and have to pay out, and then your brother could hire a hit man to try to kill you hoping to inherit some winnings.  Within one year you could (theoretically) be $1 million in debt and file for bankruptcy, leading to you living on food stamps and a $450-per-month stipend.

#6 – You could blow all your money on cocaine.

#7 – You could go to the Canary Islands, get married and buy a house, spending so much of the money that you end up taking a job at McDonald’s to cover your living expenses.

#8 – You could drown in your Scrooge McDuck style money bin

#9 – Your husband could win the lottery and never tell you, then vanish once you were on to him.

#10 – You could trip on the ginormous check while exiting the stage, fall down three steps and paralyze yourself.  You could then fall in love with a nurse in the hospital, get married and flee the country to avoid paying the hospital bills which weren’t covered by your insurance because you quit your job the minute you found out about the lottery win

California has a handbook for lottery winners. It doesn’t sound like anyone is reading it.

Okay, so three of those listed above never happened – can you figure out which ones I made up?

And what do you think is the worst thing that could happen after winning the lottery?

Judging others . . . deciding what’s right and wrong about how someone else is living, or dressing, or eating.  Trying to weigh up someone’s actions and declare them “guilty” or “innocent.”

Why do we do it?

Yesterday I wrote about how so much of that comes from fear.  But I think another reason we have a tendency to judge people is a result of our modern times – being right is seen as the ultimate “win”.  We want to be right.  And if someone disagrees with us, we will tear them and their argument apart in order to be right.

This is not the way of Christ.

He tells us to view others as better than ourselves.

He tells us to treat others as we would want to be treated.

He tells us to love even our enemies.

Henri Nouwen, in his book Here and Now, addresses this burden of judgment:

“We spend countless hours making up our minds about others.  An unceasing exchange of opinions about people close by or far away keeps us distracted and allows us to ignore the truth that we ourselves are the first ones who need a change of heart and probably the only ones whose hearts we indeed can change.

“We always say again: “What about him? What about her?” What Jesus says to us, as he said to Peter, who wanted to know what would happen to John: “What does it matter to you.  You are to follow me” (John 21:21-22)

“Imagine your having no need at all to judge anybody.  Imagine your having no desire to decide whether someone is a good or bad person. Imagine your being completely free from the feeling that you have to make up your mind about the morality of someone’s behavior.  Imagine that you could say: “I am judging no one!”

“Imagine – Wouldn’t that be true inner freedom?”

Are you brave enough to share with us the folks that you find yourself drawn to judge? Or maybe you’ve overcome a long-standing judgment you’ve held against certain types of people…I’d love to hear about it in the comments section below.