“An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered” – GK Chesterton.
“A ship in harbor is safe – but that is not what ships are for.” John A. Shedd, Salt from My Attic
There is something about this adventure that is exposing parts of me I never even knew existed. There is something about removing life’s small conveniences that has stripped me of my power to subdue the darker parts of myself, while simultaneously revealing to me all the potential this life has to offer.
Why this? Why now? Frustrations with my children reach higher levels than before, yet five minutes later I find myself filled with such compassion for them, and love, and tenderness, that I’m not sure what to do about it. One moment I find myself wondering how I will make it through another 14 weeks on the road – the next moment I cannot comprehend living in one place for an extended period of time, ever again.
Don’t worry – I’m not losing my mind. I don’t think so, anyway. But I am losing something. Perhaps by heading out on an adventure such as this, freeing myself from so many of the normal constraints, a truer sort of me is coming out. That’s what it feels like anyway. Remember that part in Voyage of the Dawn Treader where Aslan confronts Eustace (who has been turned into a dragon after sleeping on dragon treasure) and gently but painfully removes his skin? Here it is
Then the lion said – but I don’t know if it spoke – You will have to let me undress you. I was afraid of his claws, I can tell you, but I was pretty nearly desperate now. So I just lay flat down on my back to let him do it.
The very first tear he made was so deep and I thought it had gone right into my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt. The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off. You know – if you’ve ever picked the scab of a sore place. It hurts like billy-oh but it is such fun to see it coming away.
I’m willing now, perhaps more so than at any other point in my life, to have my calloused skin torn off. This trip has positioned me for just such a hide removal. And even though it hurts, I’m excited to see what kind of person will emerge.
What events in your life have torn off your outer hide? What were the positive things that emerged from the pain?