Revisiting the Scariest Moment of My Life

wierenga_AtlasGirl_Mech-800x1232Two years ago my family and I were returning from a four-month cross-country trip, and we were glad to be home. It had been a wonderful, beautiful, frustrating, terrifying, exhausting, unbelievable, magical, stressful, incredible four months.

Without a doubt, the highlight of the trip (if by highlight you mean moment that will never be forgotten) was when we started down the Teton Pass and lost our brakes. Today I’m retelling that story over at my friend Emily Wierenga’s blog as we celebrate the forthcoming release of her travel memoir, Atlas Girl.

If you’ve never read the story of our brakes going out, or if you’d like to revisit it with me, please head over to Emily’s place and go down the mountain with us. And be sure to take a look at her new book as well.

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By the way, thanks for continuing to check out my sporadic writing here at the blog. With our move into the city, and a crazy amount of writing work, and a baby on the way, it’s been hard to find blogging time. But I’m still here, and I’m glad you are, too. If you’d like to get some mini-posts from me, you can always follow my writer’s page on Facebook, where I occasionally post some shorter pieces.

May the road go ever on before you, and may your brakes never go out!

 

The Definition of the Christian Life in One Word

Today’s #100Words comes from Brennan Manning’s life-changing book, Ruthless Trust:

This book started itself with a remark from my spiritual director. “Brennan, you don’t need any more insights into the faith,” he observed. “You’ve got enough insights to last you three hundred years. The most urgent need in your life is to trust what you have received.”

That sounded simple enough. But his remark sparked a searing reexamination of my life, my ministry, and the authenticity of my relationship with God – a reexamination that spanned the next two years. The challenge to actually trust God forced me to deconstruct what I had spent my life constructing, to stop clutching what I was so afraid of losing…

At another point in the book, Manning asks someone if he could describe the Christian life in one sentence.

“Brennan,” the man replied. “I can describe it in one word. ‘Trust.'” Manning’s examination of “trust” in this book changed the way I live my life. I cannot recommend it enough.

Find out more about Brennan Manning’s book HERE.
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Previous books highlighted in #100Words:

Micha Boyett’s Found
Michelle DeRusha’s Spiritual Misfit

Found: A Story of Questions, Grace & Everyday Prayer (#100Words)

bookLG-found2Today’s another installment in #100Words, the first 100 (or so) words of a book I’d like you to know about. Some of these books I’ve read, some I haven’t. Some I’ve received advanced reader copies, others I haven’t. Hopefully getting a quick glimpse into a book will motivate you to check it out a little further.

Today’s book is Micha Boyett’s beautifully written book, Found: A Story of Questions, Grace & Everyday Prayer. Here are the first #100Words:

I

Late November; Friday before Advent
   I zip my fleece and turn back from the doorway of our barely-lived-in bottom-floor apartment, my bag already slipping off my shoulder.
   “And don’t let him run down the sidewalk. Cars just come out of garages. They don’t even look…”
   “I know, babe, I know.” Chris is holding our eighteen-month-old son, August. He grins. I’ve already given my husband a ten-minute speech on our kid’s needs and the dangers of diaper rash. Now I’m just being ridiculous.
   “Okay.” I look in Chris’s eyes and breathe deep.
   “We’re good, honey.”
   “Yep. Okay. Yes.” I kiss August…
Check out Micha’s book HERE.
Check out her blog HERE.

My Biggest Fear, and an Exciting Announcement (For Me, Anyway)

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I think it’s time for me to get over a major fear.

Fear is a peculiar thing – it gives you, among other things, huge blind spots. It closes off entire areas of life. Once you allow fear to send you on a detour, it’s easy to forget about the area fear led you away from. Soon, if fear is allowed to complete its work, you won’t even remember the thing you’re afraid of – you’ll just sort of naturally navigate in the opposite direction.

In the last few months I stumbled upon an old fear of mine: I am afraid of letting people read my fiction.

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I went to Turkey sixteen months ago to write about a man who was dying of liver and colon cancer. When I landed in that country, we knew that without a miracle he would die very soon. I met with him for three weeks in January, wrote his book in February and March, and the book released in July, the same month that he passed away.

In April, after I finished writing his story, I found myself thinking a lot about my own mortality. After spending three weeks chatting almost every day with a dying man (he was only 50 years old), I was struggling with the idea of my own death. I didn’t want to die. I was desperate to avoid it.

One of those April nights, as we all sat around the dinner table, my children asked if I would write a book for them. I had always wanted to write a children’s book, but one that also appealed to adults, so we sat there at the dinner table and brainstormed ideas for the story. Long after the food had grown cold, I grilled them with questions, and they gave me ideas.

Then I spent April and May and part of June writing this novel about a boy who loses his mother but refuses to accept it. It is a fantastical story about an old woman and two opposing forces and the Tree of Life.

The funny thing was, I didn’t realize at the time that I was writing out my own struggle with death. To me, it was simply a story. But when I finished, and I stepped back, I realized so much of what I had been wrestling with was there, in the pages.

I spent a few weeks reading the book to my children, sitting in our white chair as they crowded at my feet. I promised them I would self-publish it for them to read.

Then I closed the doc on my computer, and it’s been sitting in my Scrivener file for about a year.

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I’ve had more writing work in the last year than I’ve ever had in the last five years. I’ve been blessed to be part of some incredible stories.

But I also know that I’ve been hiding behind this busy-ness. I use the books I write for other people to avoid rejection. In some ways, I hide behind those stories.

Then the other day, Cade asked me a question.

“Dad, when are you going to publish that story you wrote for us? You promised, you know.”

I promised him I would have it in book form by Christmas.

* * * * *

So there you go. By Christmas, this book of fiction will be in print (you can hear me talk about this a little bit on Bryan Allain’s podcast, The Schnoz Cast). I’ve got someone reading through it now, someone who will hopefully help me shape it a little better. I might do a Kickstarter campaign in the fall to help cover some of the costs and gather a small tribe behind the launch, so keep your eyes open for that. I figure if I can sell 100 copies in advance, I should be able to cover design and editing costs.

I guess the most freeing part of it is no longer caring if it’s any good or not. I mean, that’s not entirely true, I’ll still care, but at some point I think you have to move forward, no matter the consequences, no matter how rough the finished product still feels. At some point you have to say, “This is what I have to offer, this is the best that I can do, so you can take it or leave it.”

I guess for now the only other thing I have to say is, “Stay tuned.”

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What are you afraid of?

Spiritual Misfit: A Memoir of Uneasy Faith #100Words

Spiritual-Misfit-1024x1579This is the first in another new series I’m going to run here at the blog, #100Words. Basically, it’s the first 100 (or so) words of a book I’d like you to know about. Some of the books I’ve read, some I haven’t. Some I’ve received advanced reader copies, others I haven’t. Hopefully getting a quick glimpse into a book will motivate you to check it out a little further.

Today’s book is Spiritual Misfit: A Memoir of Uneasy Faith by my online friend, Michelle DeRusha. Here are the first #100Words:

In third grade I stole a necklace. As I labored over fractions, nibbling a rubbery pencil eraser and spitting grainy flecks onto the floor, I spied it glinting from Kim’s desk across the aisle. We all sat at those Formica elementary school desks, the ones that yawned wide open over our laps so our pencil cases and workbooks and glue sticks were readily accessible. The necklace sat right at the edge, within reach. It was exquisite, exotic – a choker with a black velvet strap and a single brilliant faux sapphire, like something Barbie would wear with a sequined halter, the…

To check out the book, click HERE. To check out Michelle’s blog, click HERE.

BOOK OF THE WEEK – The Good News of Revelation

Helyer_Cyzewski.GoodNews.FRONT5_Today I interview Ed Cyzewski, author of The Good News of Revelation. Ed is a kind, thoughtful writer and a good interwebs friend of mine. Plus, he was brave enough to release two books within a month of each other, and if that doesn’t make you want to read this interview, I’ve got nothing else for you.

Revelation scares me. Should I be afraid?

I would be more afraid of the people who tell you to be afraid of Revelation. There’s no doubt that the images, beasts, and scenes are frightening, but in their original context few if any were ever intended to correspond with specific, literal, future events. Rather, they created a kind of painting that captures what a group of early Christians were experiencing and the hope they were waiting for. The original readers of Revelation had a great deal more to fear from their Roman rulers than from John’s letter to them. In fact, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to send a letter to people who are suffering and dying for their faith that tells them some day they’re going to suffer and die for their faith a lot more. Revelation was offering a commentary of their circumstances and offering hope for the future.

When did the idea begin percolating in your mind? Was there a particular event or realization that led to the book?

While reading Jewish literature from between the testaments called the Pseudipigrapha in Israel, I came across all of these books like 1 Enoch that read almost exactly like Revelation—it’s called apocalyptic literature. It was one of the most startling epiphanies of my life. I saw that John was really just using a literary form that would have been commonly understood in his day. These books have been neglected by many popular Christian writers who tend to match Revelation with current events rather than the literature of its context.

The majority of the books available that come close to our book’s focus are long and written for academic readers—they always say they’re for pastors and lay men, but I don’t buy it. I wanted to write something short and accessible that still gave readers a basic interpretive framework for understanding Revelation.

When I was a kid there were always people trying to interpret Revelation, saying such and such was so and so and this place was that place. How does your book fit into the long line of Revelation prognosticators?

My co-author lines up more with the futurists, though he is far from a sensationalist futurist. I’m more of a partial-preterist along the lines of NT Wright. We tried to keep our book open to a variety of possibilities. However, I think there’s room for our views to intersect a bit.

There is no doubt that Revelation from start to finish had a specific meaning to the original readers in Asia Minor (modern day Turkey). There is no doubt that it uncovers spiritual realities that continue to apply to us today, such as the rule of Christ and our conflict with the “dragon.” There also is no doubt that Revelation speaks to God’s future defeat of evil, restoration of justice, and recreation of the earth. Revelation speaks to our past, present, and future, but it’s hard to precisely line up each detail.

Which one of your favorite authors (living or dead) would you like to read TGNoR and why?

That’s a tough one. I would love for John Collins to read it. He wrote The Apocalyptic Imagination, which is one of the defining books on the literary genre of Revelation. I would love to know what he thinks of how we used historical fiction to illustrate the original context of Revelation. However, he would probably also point out everything I messed up, so maybe that’s not the best idea after all!

This book is co-written. Talk to me about that process.

This was a tough book to co-write since we hold to different views on some points of Revelation, but we do share a pretty significant amount of common ground. However, our goal all along was to recover the story behind Revelation’s original audience. What was John saying to the seven churches in Asia and how does that message translate for us today?

Larry did all of the heavy lifting with scholarship and background information. He wrote the main chapters of the book and then I edited and rewrote sections in order to make them a bit more accessible. I also wrote a series of short historical fiction pieces at the start of each chapter. Each piece illustrates a key idea that we’ll be discussing.

What did you learn about Revelation while writing this book that stands out to you the most, now that you’re finished writing?

The thing that stands out the most is that I still have no idea what the bowls of wrath are all about. I have some ideas, but reading commentaries proposing various views did little to clear that up for me. It just goes to show how hard it is to understand a form of literature from 2,000 years ago!

However, in the process of writing this book I have also been struck with just how important Revelation 12 is for the overall trajectory of the book. It really provides an overview of the high points in salvation history while also explaining why the Christians in Asia Minor were suffering. It’s the part of Revelation that best captures the tension we experience of God’s victory of evil even though we still are contending against the “dragon” today.

What’s your favorite cereal, and how can it be anything but Lucky Charms?

I don’t see how it could. I gave them a fair chance, but the marshmallows grossed me out. I transitioned to Fruit Loops and never looked back. Although as an adult I’ve moved on to Honey Nut Cheerios. It’s hard to beat the nostalgia of childhood I experience with a sweet bowl of Cheerios.

Thanks so much for hosting me at your blog. I hope my cereal preference didn’t ruin everything!

Learn more about the Good News of Revelation.

Ed Cyzewski is the co-author of The Good News of Revelation and Unfollowers: Unlikely Lessons on Faith from the Doubters of Jesus. He shares his imperfect and sometimes sarcastic thoughts on following Jesus at www.inamirrordimly.com.