Need a Good Laugh? Check Out These Videos:
Sometimes Wednesday feels like the middle of nowhere. Check out these videos and laugh your way into Thursday:
The first two are by Tripp and Tyler. Their “Sh*t No One Says” video may or may not be on The Today Show at 10am this morning.
The hilarious bears video was created by Bryan Allain. For the entire “The Truth About…” series, click HERE
My Human Alarm Clock
Nearly every morning these days I wake up to the sound of little feet. I can hear them coming through the living room, scratching on the carpet, practically prancing with energy and excitement at a new day.
It’s our little Abra, and she comes into our bedroom, climbs up up up into our tall bed and plops down between the sleeping form of her mother and the barely awake lump that is her father.
“Good morning, Doodle,” I say. Read more 
The Debt Ceiling According to Dr. Seuss
I’m Uncle Sam
I’m Uncle Sam
Uncle Sam is who I am
That Uncle Sam! That Uncle Sam! I do not like that Uncle Sam!
Do you like your debt with ham?
I do not like it, Uncle Sam. I do not like my debt with ham.
Read more
Five Writing Lessons I Learned From “Dumb and Dumber”
Believe it or not, Dumb and Dumber had more to offer than a couple of rad bowl cuts (speaking of which, I hope you caught the excellent “Bowlin’” video featuring Chris Tomlin, Tyler Stanton and Tripp Crosby).
If you can get past the scenes of frozen snot, exploding farts and of course the most annoying sound in the world, there are a few gems hidden in there, things that every writer needs to pick up on. 17 years later, here is what I remember:
1) Always keep your reader guessing. Lloyd trades in their awesome doggy-mobile for a moped. He pulls up beside Harry, who is walking along a deserted highway. Harry sees the moped, and you’re waiting for him to go off on Lloyd. But they kept me guessing:
“Just when I thought you couldn’t possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this… and totally redeem yourself!”
2) 3rd Person Omniscient can be a fun point-of-view to write from because your reader knows more than your characters, and you can use this to your advantage. For example, when a thug sneaks into Harry and Lloyd’s apartment and cuts off the head of their parakeet, we know it’s a reference to the horse’s head in The Godfather…but Lloyd sees it as just another piece of bad luck:
“We got no food, no jobs… our PETS’ HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!”
3) As I mentioned in Five Writing Lessons I Learned From Napoleon Dynamite, creative dialogue can help your reader learn more about your characters, as well as inject some humor:
“Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something. I don’t know, I wasn’t really paying attention.”
4) Flannery O’Connor said that anyone who survived childhood has enough material to write for the rest of his or her life (via Anne Lamott). And this exchange in Dumb and Dumber proves it:
Lloyd: You’re it.
Harry: You’re it.
Lloyd: You’re it, quitsies!
Harry: Anti-quitsies, you’re it, quitsies, no anti-quitsies, no startsies!
Lloyd: You can’t do that!
Harry: Can too!
Lloyd: Cannot, stamp it!
Harry: Can too, double stamp it, no erasies!
Lloyd: Cannot, triple stamp, no erasies, Touch blue make it true.
Harry: No, you can’t do that… you can’t triple stamp a double stamp, you can’t triple stamp a double stamp! Lloyd!
Lloyd: [hands over ears] LA LA LA LA LA LA!
Harry: LLOYD! LLOYD! LLOYD!
5) Sometimes, if you’re story is going no where, try flipping it on its head. Like this awesome trailer, where Dumb and Dumber becomes Inception:
What were your favorite scenes from Dumb and Dumber?
Just Sayin’: The Best Quotes of 2010
See you next year. In the mean time, enjoy the best and worst (mostly worst) of 2010:
“I am on the toilet thinking about writing a third book.” – former baseball player, Jose Canseco
”It is not a sweatshop. You go in this place and it’s a factory but, my gosh, they’ve got restaurants and movie theaters and hospitals and swimming pools. For a factory, it’s pretty nice.” – Steve Jobs
“Its a official dat i am leavin skool and enterin draft. … i aint doin anotha yr.” – Oklahoma point guard Tommy Mason-Griffin declaring his career choice via Facebook (via ESPN)
“The internet’s completely over. … The internet’s like MTV. At one time MTV was hip and suddenly it became outdated. Anyway, all these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can’t be good for you.” - Prince
“I hear comments sometimes that large oil companies are greedy companies or don’t care, but that is not the case with BP. We care about the small people.” – BP Chairman, Carl-Henric Svanberg
“Few children of famous people succeed. Most of them are little shits.” — Jamie Oliver, TV chef
“A lot of people say, ‘I would rather have a heart attack at the height of sexual passion’. I think I would prefer to be killed by a bookcase.” — Tom Stoppard
“I thought it was gum.” — Paris Hilton, denying responsibility for packet of cocaine Las Vegas police found in her bag.
“I didn’t have the balls. This is not my thing.” — Christian Hernandez, 22-year-old Mexican matador arrested for breach of contract when he dropped his cape and fled from a bull midfight.
“Letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model.” — Robert Hintze, founder of dating site BeautifulPeople.com, which dropped 5,000 members who appeared in photos to have gained weight over the holidays.
“I need a vacation spot for my lice…Beards: Uggs for your face.” – Bryan Allain
I learned that it takes precisely 6.5 weeks to be able to laugh about a bombed performance in front of 13,000 people. – Tyler Stanton
So what great 2010 quotes by celebrities, athletes, bloggers or your best friends did I miss?
