I can’t believe it’s been six months since we broke up. So I saw you the other day. And I have to admit: you were looking good. I guess all the rumors I heard about you are true, the stuff people are saying about how you’re losing weight, working out, looking better in HD. All that stuff.
I know we’ve been hanging out, but I don’t want you to get your hopes up. The truth of the matter is, I’m using you for the World Cup. And now that England and the US are out, I think I’m moving on. That’s it. There’s no chance of anything long-term. I’m sorry to say it like this, over email, but you’d have to find out at some point, and I thought it best you find out from me and not someone else.
I know my kids are still into you, and that’s cool. I don’t expect them to take the same view of you as I; after all, you’ve only ever really shown them cartoons and a few harmless Disney videos. And sometimes when people split up it takes the kids longer to separate.
I still wish you’d stop hanging out over at my parents, but I’m learning how to deal with that. And I wish you’d stop lobbying for more of my time – I’m pretty content now watching the occasional movie on DVD or playing Wii. That’s all it’s going to be, at least until January 1st, 2011 when I break out the box set of “Lost.”
Then we will have a lot of catching up to do.